Year 4 at Google: Life over Work

When personal changes resonate with global upheavals, I realized that true engineering practice lies in life itself.

I wrote my "3 Years at Google" post while in Toronto. back then, due to H1b visa issues, I had been living there for over 3 months. Standing at the end of 2025 and looking back, I am certain that this detour was not a bad thing, and I am filled with gratitude.

Starting from the Move to Canada in 2024

I started my Plan B early in March 2024, preparing everything needed to relocate to Canada. Fortunately, Canada recognizes "common law partners," so I could apply for a spousal visa for my girlfriend without being married. In April, when we learned the H1b lottery results (which didn't go well), our Canadian visas were almost ready. Thus began the long and complicated moving process.

The day before we left, my manager treated our team to a meal. He then bought me a coffee, and we walked around Kirkland Downtown, discussing my career path. Looking back, plans really couldn't keep up with changes.

The next day, we drove to Vancouver, handed the car over to a transport service, and took a one-way flight to Toronto. We arrived at 10 PM, met our rental agent, and started our new life with a time difference from the team.

Even after leaving Toronto, I still miss the sunsets there

If a Girl is Willing to Follow You, Marry Her!

This was the beginning of a major life change. Settled in Toronto, I had free mornings due to the time difference. One morning, seeing my girlfriend watching TV on the sofa, my thoughts drifted back to 2021. We had known each other for less than six months when she unhesitatingly moved with me from California to Kirkland. When we got the visa news, she didn't hesitate to move to Toronto with me either. I realized I needed to honor her trust.

So, one weekend morning, I proposed we go buy a ring. She realized we needed to discuss marriage, so she went along. We planned a trip to Europe in October. I planned to propose there, and she knew it. We kept it unspoken until the moment happened.

Funny story: I intended to propose on a boat in Venice. The ring was in my pocket, my hand clutching it tight. I decided to do it after the next bend. Just as we turned, another boat approached. A guy on that boat was on one knee, proposing to his girlfriend. Our boatman shouted, "Are you sure?" (I didn't even know who he was asking). Seeing this, I quietly put the ring back in my bag.

The proposal finally happened at our last stop in Italy - Matera. She said yes, and she was happy.

The Sassi caves in Matera are beautiful

Preparing for Weddings Reconnected Me with Family

In January 2025, we went back to China. Our parents met in Fuzhou. Neither side is from Fuzhou, but the name implies "good fortune," so it was a fitting meeting place. I then returned to Nanchang to see other family members. I learned my cousin was also getting married in June. It seemed our family was full of joy this year. But the joy at the start of the year would contrast sharply with the worries at the end.

Our wedding date was set for March 3rd. We held a small ceremony at Toronto City Hall. Funny enough, I almost messed up the process. I thought getting the "marriage license" meant we were married, but it's just a form! I realized a week before that we needed an officiant. I frantically booked one upstairs at City Hall.

The ceremony went smoothly, and friends partied at our apartment until late. Our parents weren't there, but our friends made sure we weren't lonely on this important day.

It was during the Ghibli aesthetic trend

Return to the US: A Twist of Fate

By March, H1b preparations were intense again. With Trump in office, scrutiny was high. But my company reminded me: I could prepare for an L1 visa.

After the wedding, I rushed to prepare L1 documents. Ironically, just after submitting them, I won the H1b lottery! After much thought, I stuck with the L1 path to ensure I could return to the US by October. It turned out to be a lucky choice, dodging a bullet.

I got the L visa in June and planned our move back. Two international moves in exactly two years – exhausting. On August 1st, we stumbled back to Kirkland. It felt amazing – familiar yet slightly strange. Walking in the office, colleagues who didn't know me well were surprised, thinking I had rejoined the company.

In September, two days before I flew to Bali for our wedding, Trump announced a $100k fee for H1b holders. My manager texted me late at night. Fortunately, being on an L visa saved me.

The Harvest of 2025 Fades in October

Since our March wedding lacked family, we planned a September wedding in Bali and an October one in Nanchang. The Bali wedding was beautiful, and everyone had fun.

The Villa in Bali was beautiful

Immediately after Bali, we had the Nanchang wedding in early October. We went the traditional route, inviting many relatives and friends. It was fun, and I saw friends I hadn't seen since graduation. We even watched fireworks!

But the turning point came on the last night. My aunt felt unwell after dinner. She almost fainted driving home but managed to pull over. My parents took her to the hospital. I was only told after I flew back to Kirkland. Diagnosis: late-stage stomach cancer. She is currently undergoing chemotherapy.

Then my cousin flew back to see her mom, and I went to California to help watch her home. When she returned, she told me my grandpa was also diagnosed with late-stage cancer. Due to his age, surgery isn't an option, so he's on painkillers.

My parents thought they could rest after my wedding. Now, my dad is busy with grandpa, and my mom with my aunt.

Work Stops, But Life Goes On

Looking back at my 4th year at Google, my focus was entirely on life. I am grateful – for meeting the right girl, for my manager's support, and for family and friends. This year was full of variables, from the macro environment to family life. Everything seems to be building up for 2026.

The biggest reason I wrote this is: This year taught me to go from "caring only for myself" to "becoming a roof" for others.

In the past, I lived in the illusion of an "elite worker": as long as I code well, get promoted, and grow assets, I am successful. But seeing my wife helpless and needing support, hearing news of family illness, I realized life is where I need to spend the most energy.

This year, I discussed my destiny with Gemini countless times. Facing life's upheavals, I sought comfort in AI-generated text. But I know that comfort is temporary. Ultimately, I must face what happens in life. Whether good or bad, I need to be the one standing in front.